White coat. Heels.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
