you traded sex for a burrito?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
you had me at cake vodka
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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