How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
