just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
