you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
