He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Randomize
