this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
