She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
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