he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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