You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Randomize
