Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(913): View more from Kansas

is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?

(312): View more from Illinois

you sound like my dream girl

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(917): View more from New York City

I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.

Fav 65 6729 831
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(478): View more from Georgia

yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"

Fav 8 4870 1099
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(972): View more from Texas

you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.

(214): View more from Texas

round 2?

(972): View more from Texas

EVER.

Fav 10 1424 3919
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(773): View more from Illinois

that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.

Fav 10 4221 1984
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(201): View more from New Jersey

You kept calling me your small dog last night.

Fav 6 1085 3128
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(503): View more from Oregon

My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf

Fav 28 1670 7445
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(985): View more from Louisiana

Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.

Fav 1 537 758
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(905): View more from Ontario

Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both

Fav 0 36 5
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