we're blogging at a bar
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Randomize
