I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize