Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
She's the barista slut.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
