Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
