yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize