Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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