Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
