Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize