Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
