I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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