Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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