I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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