Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
