No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
