should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
