Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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