the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
