He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize