LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
