He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
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