Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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