They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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