The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
