Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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