with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
