I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
