I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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