So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
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