He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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