I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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