Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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