You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
