when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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