I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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