I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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