before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
