is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
