oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
