Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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